Friday, April 27, 2012

Two states

Should I call this a mere coincidence? A couple of weeks back, my wife and I attended our friend's marriage (Love marriage to be specific). My friend is a Maharashtrian and the bride (who is also my friend) is a Kannadian South Indian. Needless to say the match that the God made is perfect! Both liked each other, fell in love with each other and then finally decided to get married :-) Everyone enjoyed the wedding ceremony.

In the evening, we went to our another friend staying nearby where I located a book - 'Two States - the story of my marriage'  by Chetan Bhagat. I got interested into the book by reading this -

"Love marriages around the world are simple! Boy loves girl. Girl loves boy. They get married.

In India, there are a few more steps:-
Boy loves girl. Girl loves boy.
Girl's family has to love boy. Boy's family has to love girl.
Girl's family has to love boy's family. Boy's family has to love girl's family.
Girl and boy still love each other. They get married."

Was this a coincidence that my eyes caught only this book among the other books resting on the bookshelf ? I had just attended a love marriage of my friends who belong to two different states in India. I tried to imagine the conversations/discussions that might have happened between the two families - two communities when my friends had told their decision to them. But I know imagining about a battle is always easy than actually fighting it! So kudos to my friends for winning it ! :-)

I borrowed the book from my friend and was totally engrossed with reading the book after that! A story about two friends - Punjabi and Tamilian, deeply in love and want to get married, not by hurting their parents' feelings, but with a smile on both parents' faces instead! An excellent book which touches your heart ! What I most liked is the approach the couple took to convince their families instead of fighting and rebelling. Chetan has beautifully narrated the story and you won't feel keeping the book down until it is completely finished. Hats off to you Chetan ! I loved the book !

Would like to end this post by providing a part of the speech(message) from the book that the girl's father gave during the wedding ceremony. We should carve this message on our heart :-

"So why do parents object to cross community/culture marriage? It is not only about another community. It is the fact that your daughter has found a boy for herself. We as parents feel disobeyed, left out and disappointed. We bring our children up from babies to adults, how can they ignore us like this? All our frustration comes out in anger.

But we forget that this has happened because your child had love to give to someone in this world. Is that such a bad thing? Where did the child learn to love? From us, after all, the person they loved first is you.

Actually, the choice is simple. When your child decides to love a new person, you can either see it as a chance to hate some people - the person they choose and their families. Which is what we did for a while. However, you can also see it as a chance to love some more people. And since when did loving more people become a bad thing?

Yes, the Tamilian in me is a little disappointed. But the Indian in me is quite happy. And more than anything, the human being in me is happy. After all, we have decided to use this opportunity to create more loved ones for ourselves!"

Enjoy reading!


  1. Gewat review of the book :-) I thought it will be on JRuby ;-)

  2. Nicely depicted!
    - Pratik

  3. nice narration...missed the marriage though but need to read the book, awaiting the pics :)

  4. nice write up! enjoyed reading it :)
    I can vouch for "...with a smile on both parents' faces instead!" ;)